Talk for Article "Why clean air and water is a matter of life and death"

Talk about this Article

  1. Daniel, I’m about to publish your piece if you want to take a last check.

    AL

    1. I have had a last check, and I love what you’ve done.
      DD

      1. Good man! Look forward to future collaborations.

        AL

  2. Thanks Daniel …. yes, I see, our comments are back the front chronologically. No idea!

    Angela

  3. Daniel, I’m working on the piece…I don’t want to ‘do’ it all as that’s not the idea. With your science background, could you explain these in simple language for me…

    – “well established pollution–disease pairs”

    – PM2 air pollution

    – developmental neurotoxicants, endocrine disruptors, new classes of pesticides such as the neonicotinoids”

    I’m going to rework the latter part of the piece but that is editorial not factual.

    All best,

    Angela

  4. Hi Angela, Thank you for pointing these out and letting me edit them. I had to look up 3 and 4, which I should have done from the start. Thank you also for making this article better. This reminds me of some articles in Wikipedia. I started a few articles, and for each piece of help, it always grew from measly stub, to acceptable and always to at least good enough , if not better, even without my help in the end. I attempted four changes visible under “history”: clarifications with links: pairs, PM2->particles, Electronic waste, pesticides and food. 1 “pollution disease pair” I thought this list would be the best way of explaining it https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_pollution-related_diseases 2 PM2 – should have been PM2.5. I changed from PM2 to “fine particles” and two links. Fine particles are devious, since this new type of particles are small enough to bypass our natural defences. https://www.health.ny.gov/environmental/indoors/air/pmq_a.htm https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Particulates#Size.2C_shape_and_solubility_matter 3. “develomental neurotoxins” Electronic waste covers “develomental neurotoxins” , so I changed to that. With a link. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electronic_waste 4. Endocrine disruptors come from: pesticides and other pollution in our food So I changed to that, plus links. I also added the links to the bottom, which is either “for good measure” or “superfluous”.

  5. How in the world did this piece of text ‘ 1. not come as a reply to Angela’s request and at 2. 12 hours ago? 3. Where did all the paragraph spaces disappear to ? “it’s a mystery” – from the movie , Shakespeare in Love.

  6. Hi Daniel, just saw the full Talk here … great, I’ll edit this and you can seen what I’ve done. Earlier I left a note, via my Profile page I think. I do need the WHO link but other edits I can do.

    Angela – Thurs pm.

  7. Daniel, just catching up with this. I’ll have a good read and get back to you Thursday. Angela

  8. I feel that short headers somehow do not seem to work as well as I had hoped. I had no headers at all in “How to make gold”. Perhaps I should avoid them in the future_

  9. It will be longer. There is a lot in the report in the Lancet that I think is worth writing. In this initial draft, the “cost” part, the bottom half are just personal ideas, which perhaps I should leave out of this. I shall let you know when I would like you to read it over.

  10. I thought that my answer would appear indented, as a reply to your text, Angela. It did not, so I am trying to make this text a reply – as a test.

  11. Hi Daniel, I was delighted to see you were doing this as hoped there would be a WikiTribune story on the report. Will it be longer? Let me know if you’d like it read over. Angela

    1. I have made a rewrite. Would you care to read it?

      1. NB: I am primarily here to beta-test. I am not an aspiring writer. I will trust yours, or any other Wikitribune journalist changes over my own, so please cut whatever you like. If not a jota of my text is left, that is totally fine by me.

        It is funny how my two first replies did not indent as a reply under your box before, but my latest replies properly indent now.

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